Happy Birthday, Blondie

Mello stared at the two boys in front of him, blinking and more than a little stunned. He was currently tied down to his seat – courtesy of Matt’s collection of scarves – and he really had no idea why he was being held captive in his own bedroom no less.
But still, Matt and Near stood in front of him, the former looking bored as usual, a cigarette smoking at his lips, while the latter stood nonchalantly, fidgeting at a strand of hair with one hand while the other held a piece of paper.

“What the fuck is this about?” Mello asked bluntly, still a little groggy from sleep – yes he had been forcefully ripped out of his bed before being tied to the chair.

Neither one of them answered him instead the pale haired boy cleared his throat and began reading in a monotonous tone.

“You’re stupid and blind,
Both are traits you hate,
But one thing I don’t understand
Is how you can forget the date.”

There was silence as the prisoner stared at Near, unable to even blink.

“Huh?”

They both ignored him and Matt grabbed the paper and began to speak, cigarette still in between his lips.

“Roses are red and dandelions are white – what the hell happened to the violets?” he asked suddenly, glaring at the sheet and then at Near who simply rolled his eyes and murmured for him to just continue. “Oh, right, yeah uh…where was I?”

Mello was seriously beginning to think his friends had finally lost it.

“Roses are red and dandelions are white
It’s pretty often that we get into fights.
Ducks go quack and cows go moo – Near, this shit’s seriously bad –
Chocolate is sweet and so are you.”

The silver haired boy snorted and pulled the sheet from his hands.

“You wrote half of it,” he said in a low tone, and both the other boys took this as a sign that he was pouting.

Meanwhile, Mello had a hard time not twitching in his seat. Not only were the two geniuses spewing poetry – really bad poetry – but they were ignoring him. And that did not settle too well with the blonde. At least if he was going to be held prisoner the least they could do was pay some bloody attention to him!

Near began reading again.

“Hey there Mello, all dressed in yellow
Leather suits you, especially from behind
I just hope you know you’re always on our minds.”

“May I remind you both that “behind” and “minds” don’t rhyme?” the boy pointed out dryly, only to receive two very annoyed looks. And when they actually took the trouble to relay their emotions, it was never a good thing, so he shut his mouth and motioned for them, which was hard considering he was tied up, to continue.

“If you still don’t get it, then you’re dumber than a fly
We thought the box with the ribbon would have caught your eye.”

“Ooh, ribbons? Where?” Mello looked around excitedly upon hearing the word. He had a fetish for ribbons after all. Last Christmas all the Wammy kids had come down to find that all the bows on their gifts from the night before had mysteriously disappeared.

The other two shook their heads in exasperation as Matt continued.

“Obviously it didn’t and you still don’t have a clue
So maybe that present, we shall not give to you.”

A blonde brow rose.

“What’s with the Yoda-speak. I mean I love the little green dude but seriously, it’s a little sci-fi.” By now he knew that whenever he was taking jibes at their little tirade, he was seriously pissing them off, but in all honesty it’s what they deserved for tying him to a chair and making him put up with really bad poetry.

“If you don’t shut your gob, I’ll beat your face in
And with you tied to your seat, it’s my sure win.”

It was Near who spoke, a threat in his usually low voice and both boys looked at him, very much impressed despite the obvious aggravation in his tone.

“Wow, Near, did you just make that up? That was smooth.”

A small smile tickled his lips and he nodded to the redhead. “Thank you, Matt, now if you’ll continue?”

He nodded and read out loud,

“Every year, it’s on the same day
And this time I’m really spelling it out for you
If you figure this out, you’ll be on your way
And I won’t shove your face into rat pooh.”

Blue eyes blinked and he could have sworn he saw two pairs of eyes widen in apprehension and expectance.

“You mean Christmas? Today’s not Christ-“

“Damnit, Mello! Are you daft?” Matt yelled, tugging at his hair and finally snapping. Next to him, Near looked ready to slap his palm to his forehead while poor Mello still had no idea what was going on and why they were so angry.

“Er…”

“Ugh! Near, that’s it, let’s just bring this doofus to the window!”

Before he knew it, the chocolate lover was being unceremoniously dragged, by the legs of the chair, towards the window, where the curtains were whipped open and his head was pushed towards the glass.

“Ouch! What the hell? Y’know what ever you’re doing it’s really getting ol….Oh…”

His voice trailed off as his eyes caught sight of the snowy lawn below him – said lawn was a couple hundred acres large but seeing as it would have been stupid to cover the entire thing, they settled for a small patch right outside Mello’s window.

There, written clearly into the white snow, were the words, “Happy Birthday Mello.”

It took him a while to take it all in and so he just stared, mouthing the words to himself before finally turning to the two, irritated boys who had allowed a slight amount of amusement into their expressions.

“It’s my birthday today?”

Near procured a calendar and showed him the date, circled in gold.

The only word that went through his mind at that moment was “wow.” It was then that he also noticed the decorations around his room – ribbons in all colours streamed across the ceiling – wrapped boxes and packages strewn all over the floor, all of them with wither the letters “N” or “M” stamped all over them. He really didn’t know what to say.

“You guys…did all this?”

“With help from L and his…” Near trailed off, a little unsure.

“Boy toy?” Matt supplied with a shrug.

Blonde brows rose.

“You mean Light?”

They both nodded.

Mello was so speechless that all he could do was grin widely in disbelief.

“I can’t believe you guys actually did all this!” he exclaimed after a while. “Crap, you guys really went through a lot to get this all done huh?”

That could easily translate into “thank you” by those close enough to understand Mello-speak. Both Matt and Near were fluent. They untied him, Matt grinning to himself proudly while Near allowed a small, understated quirk to his lips as he helped the boy up.

He bounded back over to the window.

“Man, that is brilliant.”

Snorting, Matt placed his hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Wait till you see the roof.”

Blue eyes widened and he turned to him.

“There’s more?”

The white haired boy nodded. “Try the kitchen too.”

“And the bathrooms.”

“And the library.”

Mello was reeling with excitement and with a burst of energy he spun around and ran out of the room immediately, presumably to go and see what his two friends had created – or destroyed, whichever way you looked at it – for his special day.

Matt and Near stood in his room, suppressed laughter glittering in their eyes as they watched the blonde disappear around the corner. Looking at each other, they shrugged and went to follow their friend as they simultaneously murmured endearingly,

“Happy Birthday, Blondie.”